Saturday, 18 January 2014

Oppression against Men



Mistreatment Against Male.




My deepest sympathy goes with all men out there who are continuously being tortured emotionally , mentally , physically  by the world and specifically women.


They are under continued stress at work and have to kill long working hours , are tortured by wives and family members at homes for not fulfilling demands and who are being laughed and looked down upon for complain about all atrocities and injustice against them.Who ever is facing such situation surely tries to fight back in his capacity whether knowing it or unknowingly. 

Many organizations throughout the world are struggling hard for rights of females. They are trying to protect them in every possible way against oppression , violence etc. and advocate for equal opportunities to live in this World. Every day we come across many women activists shouting on media for the rights of females.  


 But I personally believe there must be organizations to stand for rights of male and protect them from the violence and harassment from women .

If we see our culture in Asia, females are considered as weak compared to male some male take it as their birth right to treat females badly , even beat them ,especially after marriage. Many cases are registered daily for violence against female for investigation. This is a common issue in most of families in South East Asia. Some come forward and some families hide it just to save their so-called ego in society.

I would  like to write for those males who face such situation .Who are treated badly and have to suffer violence . Who are actually beaten or threaten by females ,that can be their wives or any other member from society.

Violence against men, can be in different forms and situations;
  • ·         Domestic violence
  • ·         In Revenge
These cases are not highlighted as men  never discuss any such situation with others. This is against their  ego . How come they can mention this as females are considered weaker.It will not leave good impression for particular man.

Gulf news had a survey , in which it was told that 30% men are beaten at home. Many men negate this survey totally ,some think case cannot be that severe, there can be only 3-4% cases like that and some become angry to hear that .

Few years back I knew a family living in our neighborhood where a man faced such situation . This is one example, if we start inquiring about this many cases can be identified. Every one in society is aware of the fact that in many cases men suffer the consequences , men become murderer , corrupt officials , some times become addicted to drugs or mentally unstable in some cases commit suicide sometimes just because of and sometimes for women. There are many examples of the men around us who are victimized by the females in one way or the other and I believe that women's mistreatment or harassment is severe as normally women torture mentally . Women can take help of their fake tricks , can easily lie  or even conspire against men as she knows when to use her strength of tears and emotionally blackmail others to deceive someone. 

Image on facebook.com  , shows the actual story . (I regret i could not know about the publisher of this image.)
We can see violence against men in some situations like ;
  • ·         If female is strong than male, she feels it as her right to take revenge for many other females around her who are beaten by their husbands by torturing .
  • ·         Some females do this under certain critical conditions. If they have some disease and they lose their consciousness they do not know at that time what they are actually doing. In this case beating is not limited to husband anyone who will try to cool them down or try to control them in that situation can be beaten  .
  • ·         Sometimes it happens where some females can have help of others to take any revenge from husband or anyone else.
  • ·         It also happens in families where male  have to stay with in-laws .Female thinks her on a stronger side and she torture husband or even in some cases mother in law or brother-in-law can beat  for not obeying their orders.
  • ·         It is also seen in some cases where female is illiterate and have no respect for her husband.
  • ·         If female is working , taking care of everything  and  husband is looking after his home then it can also be observed in such situations ,whenever female will be tired of work or angry about something she can mistreat her husband .
  • ·         It can be in another form , when husband was angry and he slapped his wife or hit her during argument or fight afterwards when things get normal , he can ask female to take revenge just to relax his wife. There can be two cases female can forgive her husband and can be happy just to hear this or she can take the revenge and beat him as he did and can be violent. Any victim of assault or violence suffer from many mental and physical  disorders.
  • Nowadays we are also listening about many women who are blackmailing men through social media, they are taking advantages and put men in a state of unending depression and tension.

 It is normally seen that any kind of mistreatment is result of aggression by any group of people to certain other group of people , it can be from; male to female or female to male or female to female and from male to male .

Mostly it comes from male as they are aggressive ,strong and violent. Normally emotionalism , softness etc. are thought to be feminine qualities but I think it is totally wrong. These are feelings and anyone can possess them. God have not pinned them on females. In today’s male dominated society if a man ask for guidance or help he is considered as weak and looked down upon as a female.  

As far as Muslims are concerned , it is allowed for male to even beat (very lightly , that it do not leave any mark and face must be avoided , it can be like a tap) their females but under certain severe circumstances . When females are doing something against Islamic laws , but it is emphasized that first try to convince them by discussion  but if still they do not stop ignore them try something else , use light punishment  as last option against them. Beating must not be confused with "Physical Violence" .

But as far beating ones husband is concerned Islam do not allow any female to do so , even it is said that if female is allowed to bow in front of someone except Allah , that could be  her husband. 

I know many men will be really angry after reading this and even scold me but it is a fact. I will ask them to take a break and think if they had never faced any situation in which they were hurt , mistreated or tortured by females or males.

In most of the families in Sub Continent female respect male in each relation , whether as father , brother and above all as husband . She believes that these relations are meant to protect her from every thick and thin. Many among us also believe that, " Behind every successful man there is a woman." In many parts of the world female stand side by side with male and become their strength and help them to gain a lot.  

I personally believe that there should not be any oppression against anyone regardless of sex. Islam have given equal rights to men and women and emphasized to behave nicely with everyone as we will be asked for how we treated others in this world.

 I hope there will be no mistreatment of men or women. All females and males should understand their responsibilities and stand with each other as their shield to reinforce and boost morale. 


What do you believe is there any need to stand for the rights of men in our society???? Do you think if it is true that men are also suffering form harassment and victims of violence from women??? Is there any need to protect their rights or if there is any such condition in the world???


I will be happy if you will share your thoughts with me.

Thank you for taking time and visiting my post.

Images picked from Google.com 

18 comments:

  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  2. use physical punishment or violence as last option against them. written in second last paragraph.....why Islam use the way of punishment(Penalty) because Islam wants to prevent something,some act.but violence means to hurt some one or damage some one in negative way. Islam does not allow in anyway for violence suppose kill someone.rest of topic is too good.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. yes i got your point ....
      i will try to fix soon
      thank u

      Delete
  3. mam,,,headsoff to ur views...awesome

    ReplyDelete
  4. I mean seriously , Atlast someone spoke .. Men life is not easy .. I hear women all the time talking about equality , i think they are wrong there its more about justice , Men and women are totally opposite and wen bringing equality then we are disturbing the natural equilibrium , a cart is a cart and you must not expect it to fly , Men and women must be just to each other , Protect each other and support each other in all phases of life , like women men have their responsibilities in a harsh world . Women must support them in their hard times and like wise .....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. yes umar u r right in saying that . Allah have equilibrium in this world and if we try to disturb it whole system will collapse
      in between u can write better than mine , n u must try

      Delete
  5. A.A
    WoW hatts off ! I am realy surprzd. Even i have seen such voilnt wmn. In todays wrld it is comn, wmn are more dominating than men and are still silent.they cnt express coz of so-called men's ego.
    u knw wht i think parents r lacking somewr as they r role mdls for girls and they must guid their girls befre mrrge.
    I dnt have words for ur blog and such a mrvls thinking. Spchless

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. thank u so much for your time and i really appreciate that you have gone through my blog.. I hope to see your valuable comments on more of blogs
      yes these are few pictures of society
      as people , behaviors all change in societies and are different , surely in some places we have many such incidents

      Delete
  6. Aoa,
    As expected from you different topic, nice to know men also tortured & badly treated in our society.
    Very nice, keep it up


    ReplyDelete
  7. Islam never tell a man to beat his wife. On one should be harmed from the hand or tongue of a muslim. Meaning of hadith is " the best among you is the one who is best with his wife. " the character is made proportional to one's behavior with his wife not with anyone else. Therefore, we should try to spread knowledge so that the misconceptions will be removed.

    Kindly change the paragraph where you have written that a husband can beat his wife in some cases as there is no such case permitted in Islam.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. http://www.islamicfinder.org/articles/article.php?id=307

      {Quran is very clear on this issue. Almighty Allah says: "Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has given the one more strength than the other, and because they support them from their means. Therefore, the righteous women are devoutly obedient and guard in the husband's absence what Allah would have them to guard. As to those women on whose part you fear disloyalty and ill-conduct, admonish them (first), (next), refuse to share their beds, (and last) beat them (lightly); but if they return to obedience, seek not against them means (of annoyance); for Allah is most High and Great (above you all). If you fear a breach between them twain, appoint (two) arbiters, one from his family and the other from hers. If they wish for peace, Allah will cause their reconciliation; for Allah has full knowledge and is acquainted with all things." (Quran: An-Nisaa 34-35)

      It is important to read the section fully. One should not take part of the verse and use it to justify one's own misconduct. This verse neither permits violence nor condones it. It guides us to ways to handle delicate family situation with care and wisdom. The word "beating" is used in the verse, but it does not mean "physical abuse". The Prophet (p.b.u.h.) explained it "dharban ghayra mubarrih" which means "a light tap that leaves no mark". He further said that face must be avoided. Some other scholars are of the view that it is no more than a light touch by siwak, or toothbrush.

      Generally, the Prophet (p.b.u.h.) used to discourage his followers from taking even this measure. He never hit any female, and he used to say that the best of men are those who do not hit their wives. In one Hadith he expressed his extreme repulsion from this behavior and said, "How does anyone of you beat his wife as he beats the stallion camel and then embrace (sleep with) her?” (Al-Bukhari, English Translation, vol. 8, Hadith 68, pp. 42-43)

      It is also important to note that even this "light strike" mentioned in the verse is not to be used to correct some minor problem, but it is permissible to resort to only in a situation of some serious moral misconduct when admonishing the wife fails, and avoiding from sleeping with her would not help. If this disciplinary action can correct a situation and save the marriage, then one should use it."

      Dr. Jamal Badawi, professor at Saint Mary's University in Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada, and a cross-appointed faculty member in the Departments of Religious Studies and Management, adds:

      "If the problem relates to the wife's behavior, the husband may exhort her and appeal for reason. In most cases, this measure is likely to be sufficient. In cases where the problem persists, the husband may express his displeasure in another peaceful manner, by sleeping in a separate bed from hers. There are cases, however, in which a wife persists in bad habits and showing contempt of her husband and disregard for her marital obligations. Instead of divorce, the husband may resort to another measure that may save the marriage, at least in some cases. Such a measure is more accurately described as a gentle tap on the body, but never on the face, making it more of a symbolic measure than a punitive one. }
      @sardar Faisal .. I have not emphasized on beating , but i have done a lot of research after your point and i got that i have mentioned above.
      Secondly i have mentioned that under severe condition.

      Delete
    2. "It is important to read the section fully. One should not take part of the verse and use it to justify one's own misconduct. This verse neither permits violence nor condones it. It guides us to ways to handle delicate family situation with care and wisdom. The word "beating" is used in the verse, but it does not mean "physical abuse". The Prophet (p.b.u.h.) explained it "dharban ghayra mubarrih" which means "a light tap that leaves no mark". He further said that face must be avoided. Some other scholars are of the view that it is no more than a light touch by siwak, or toothbrush. "

      And you know when you say beating what meaning we take from it. If you will write it and someone unfamiliar with Islam reads it then what meaning s/he might take from your statement.

      Delete

    3. As far as Muslims are concerned , it is allowed for male to even beat (very lightly , that it do not leave any mark and face must be avoided , it can be like a tap) their females but under certain severe circumstances . When females are doing something against Islamic laws , but it is emphasized that first try to convince them by discussion but if still they do not stop ignore them try something else , use light punishment as last option against them. Beating must not be confused with "Physical Violence" .
      this is what i have written ,, i tried to make it clear .... so anyone must not take wrong meaning

      Delete
  8. You are not fully right.But many are truth.Now a days society protect only females
    sistema venus

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hello sistema
      thanks for reading
      Yes i know i am not fully right as, behavior changes from person to person , society to society .....
      but there are some cases where we see such situation...
      rest all know who is victim of most of mistreatment .

      Delete
  9. am amazed at this extent of intriguing revelation that it happens around me and yet i never took a moment to notice @onealotutu WOW!

    ReplyDelete